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Young Love

In and Out

I’m a 19-year-old girl dating a 21-year-old guy. We’ve been dating for a year and a half, love each other dearly, have a great time together. In bed the other night, my sweet boyfriend let me put a vibrator in his ass. He wanted to do it to me, so I told him (invoking some advice I remember you giving) that he could do it to me after I did it to him. Everything was fine until a few minutes before he came, when he started (unconsciously?) muttering something about a “big black man” fucking him in the ass.

I wasn’t bothered initially–fantasies aren’t necessarily actual desires, people say all kinds of weird things during sex, etc. It was only upon further reflection that it started to worry me, because he constantly teases me about wanting a big black man instead of him (nice, white,...

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