Literally the only sex I’ve had is being raped. The only person who ever expressed any passion for me — the only person who ever made me feel sexy and desirable — was my rapist. While other people get to look back on great and terrible sex, all I have is a sex crime. A big part of why I was raped in the first place was because I was so desperate to find a partner that I went on a date with someone I shouldn’t have and got into a life-threatening situation. I do not blame myself, but that is how it happened.
I don’t know how to find a partner who wants me and who I want. Compounding the problem, I’m a niche interest in the best of circumstances. I’m a straight submissive male. Dominant women are all but impossible to find. I’ve tried joining clubs and going to...