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“Savage Love” is America’s longest running sex advice column. A new column is posted every Tuesday. Become a Magnum Sub for access to the full column and the Struggle Session posted every Thursday!

Routine Maintenance

I’m off this week. Please enjoy this column that originally ran in December of 2014. — Dan What is your stance on maintenance sex? I’d never thought about the issue until reading Amy Poehler’s new memoir. I didn’t find anything she said controversial and was surprised when this quote blew up in the feminist blogosphere: … Read More »

STRUGGLE SESSION: Host Gifts, Wedding Nights, Truck Stops, and More!

On Thursdays I respond to comments from readers and listeners. These posts are for Magnum Subs exclusively. So, if you’re already a sub, thank you and read on! If you’d like to become a sub, head over here! Magnum Subs get the Magnum Savage Lovecast (more guests, more calls, no ads), the Maxi Savage Love … Read More »

Smash Button

My heart is breaking and it’s my own fault. I started cheating on my husband of 29 years, casually at first — making out, getting groped, no penetrative sex — and then I met a man and we just clicked. I caught feelings and we started to have an intense, kinky, and very sexual and emotional … Read More »

Struggle Session: Houseboys, Kitties, Doggies, PUDs, MUDs and More!

On Thursdays I respond to comments from my readers and listeners. (It’s still Thursday, right?) These posts are for Magnum Subs. So, if you’re already a sub, thank you and read on! If you’d like to become a sub, you can do that here! Magnum Subs get the Magnum Savage Lovecast (more guests, more calls, … Read More »

Obsessed

A therapist suggested I might have “Relationship OCD,” which is OCD with the obsessions and compulsions focusing on romantic relationships. While I haven’t been formally diagnosed, it rings true to me. As soon as I get close to someone, I experience so much anxiety. If I kissed a partner and they kissed me in a … Read More »

Quickies

1. How does one tell the difference between when someone says they love you in a Platonic way and when someone says they love you in a romantic way? One asks a direct question: “That’s nice — but do you mean that platonically or do you mean that passionately? Like, do you just wanna hang out … Read More »

Micro Nots

I was seeing this guy for about four months. We were pretty much dating, doing all of the normal boyfriend/girlfriend stuff. Everything was going great up until last night when he told me he feels all of these feelings for me, but they don’t mean anything because he’s felt this same way about others, but … Read More »