I’m a 40-year-old female, cis-het. I have very discerning tastes in men, and always end up alone. Any way to be more open without sacrificing my standards?
You’ve either had a terrible run of bad luck—assuming you’ve dated more than ten men—or you’ve set your standards impossibly high. Some food for thought: perhaps you think you want a long-term relationship because you were told that’s what you’re supposed to want—you were told that’s what all good people want—but you actually don’t want a long-term relationship. They don’t make you happy. But instead of telling yourself that you’re a good person who prefers short-term relationships and/or being alone, you’ve set your standards so high—you’ve dialed them up to sabotage—because you want to be alone. And instead of owning that about yourself, you find fault in the men you...