I’m a 40-year-old woman, he’s a 35-year-old man, we’ve been together for fifteen years. We met young, and I was his first serious partner. In the beginning, sex was fun, but I’ve never had an orgasm with anyone, ever. We had a ton of other things in common and we stayed together because it mostly worked. Fifteen years later, I have two big issues: I can’t orgasm — that’s issue number one — and even if I could accept that, the sex I have with my partner is unsatisfying and has been for years. He’s a caring partner, but he’s not good in bed. My attempts to explain to him what gets me excited were ignored. When I finally told him I couldn’t keep having unsatisfying sex, his self-esteem in bed was completely destroyed. Now we don’t have sex at all.
Neither of us wants to end the relationship. We still...