Long time reader! I’m a mostly straight boy in my early 20s with a new girlfriend. I say “mostly straight” because I’m into bondage and finding men who wanted to tie me up was always easier than finding women who wanted to tie me up. But I met a girl at a party early this … Read More »

Going to be a quick session today — we’re doing a Savage Love Live today at noon (Note: We did Savage Love Live yesterday at noon. Thanks to all who attended!) — but I wanted to share this email from Philip before getting into hair and makeup for the live show… Just when I thought … Read More »

I’m a 31-year-old heterosexual woman who has been married for nine years. The math: my husband and I got married right after university. Like you, I grew up Catholic, and as a girl/woman, all of the purity culture bullshit was foisted on me. Over the years, I’ve come to reject everything I was brought up … Read More »

Struggle Session is a bonus column where I respond to comments from Savage Love readers, Savage Lovecast listeners, and the occasional online rando. I also share a letter that wasn’t included in the column and invite you to give the advice! Okay, let’s struuuugle… RTPO asked me to expand on the “zone of erotic autonomy” … Read More »

Can you expand on your “zone of erotic autonomy” concept? It has been a big help to me in my relationship, but I’m wondering where the autonomous zone’s boundaries are. My partner is a major porn and masturbation enthusiast, and over the years, it has caused a lot of friction — the good kind for … Read More »

1. Advice for a gay 28-year-old university professor who wants to cruise the apps in New York City while somehow avoiding his students? “There’s no easy solution to online dating in places where you might encounter students,” said a sexually active gay university prof who lives and fucks (and wishes to remain anonymous) in a … Read More »

Dear Readers: I’m away on my last reconnecting-with-family trip of the summer. This column originally appeared in 2018. Back with an all-new, action-packed Savage Love Quickies column next week. — Dan I’m a professional dominatrix, and I thought I’d seen everything in the last five years. But this situation completely baffled the entire dungeon. This middle-aged … Read More »

I’m a cis bisexual American woman in my 30s, married to a man. I’ve been living in Europe for the past decade. I’m self-employed, and it’s a pretty lonely existence sometimes. I don’t speak the local language well. It’s a very tight-knit culture, and everybody seems like they’ve had their friend groups since birth.  I’ve … Read More »