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Savage Lovecast Archives for 2024

Sex & Politics #36: Phoebe Maltz Bovy

It's Hard to be a Straight Lady
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On this episode of Sex & Politics, Phoebe Maltz Bovy- a Canadian feminist writer, is on to talk about female heterosexuality and its attendant perils. They talk about the dreadful Gisele Pelicot case in France, and how it calls all male morality into question, why women can be attracted to testosterone-soaked dick-monsters, the rise in … Read More »

Lying Closeted Cop

On the Magnum: Dr. Ina Park on herpes fear
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A gay man was dating a closeted cop for 4 years. Then he found out that the cop WASN’T closeted, and WASN’T single (he has a live-in boyfriend,) but IS a big fat liar. Now the caller wants closure. A straight man just got dumped by his girlfriend after 1 1/2 years. His crime? He … Read More »

Bad Boys

On the Magnum: Ashley Ray on the JonBenét Ramsey case.
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A trans guy just can’t break into gay male spaces. He feels ridiculed and rejected, and ends up sitting in a corner alone while the sweaty dance party goes on around him. He used to be confident before his transition. How can he get a little of that male swagger and bed a hot twink? … Read More »

“Please Kick Me in the Nuts.”

Guest: Leigh Cowart
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“That’s so gay!” So said a 10 year-old boy and got himself punished by the teacher who overheard him. The boy’s father is calling for advice on how to explain why saying “That’s so gay” as a pejorative is hurtful. A man with a big ole wiener sees his long distance girlfriend once per month. … Read More »

It’s Lawyer Time

On the Magnum: Comedian Bonnie Klopfer
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A straight man confesses to lurking on Discord and masturbating to the pretty female voices he hears there. Nobody knows he is doing this (except all of us now.) Must he stop? With a new hostile regime about to take power, it’s more important than ever for queer and trans folks to get their papers … Read More »

Sex & Politics #35: Peter Rothpletz

Time To Get Mean
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It seems everyone is having their post-election, post-mortem. Here’s ours. Dan brings on New Republic writer Peter Rothpletz (a.k.a. Peter Twinklage on social media,) to talk about men, and the manly way to bring them back into the fold: by being total dicks. Will this strategy bear out? We don’t know, but it sounds kind … Read More »

Is ALL Cheating Unacceptable?

On the Magnum: "Chump Lady" Tracy Schorn
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We open with a somewhat disturbing call from a woman whose white boyfriend visits “wack shacks” when he travels. He hires Asian sex workers to submit to race play and degradation. She approves of him indulging his various kinks outside of their relationship, but this? It’s the classic conundrum: the caller has a big wiener … Read More »

Sweet! Free therapy from Therapy Jeff.

Self Care? Sign Us Up!
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First off, we hear from a neglected third in a poorly executed threeway hook-up. He failed to advocate for himself, and the other two guys weren’t asking if he was ok, sitting on the couch, looking at his phone. How could this have gone better? And how can he get over the waves of insecurity … Read More »

A Politics-Free Election Day Show.

On the Magnum: Paul Rosenberg
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We’re giving you a break from whatever stressful stuff is going on this week to bring you some of the more…interesting calls we’ve collected. A man’s girlfriend wants to try saline injections on her breasts for a “24 hour boob job.” The question is, can he safely do the injecting? A woman’s cat is grieving … Read More »

Hooking Up With Your Former Bully

On the Magnum: Cody Daigle-Orians on Asexuality
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A poly guy lives in a rural area with his fiancé. He is building his own house, and hires laborers to come live with him while they build. One of the laborers started hooking up with the caller’s girlfriend without consulting the caller or gaining his consent. Now what? This guy is living in his … Read More »

Straight Male Comedians Can Be Funny Too.

On the Magnum: Des Bishop
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A woman has been dating a man from Ghana for 4 months. She just learned that he has a wife and kid back home, that he married out of familial/cultural obligation. Should the caller hold out to see if he chooses her over his overseas family? A married woman has a one year-old kid. She … Read More »

“Honey, shall we go to the lesbian sex rave?”

On the Magnum: Mormon Housewives
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A lesbian couple has been together for a couple years, and things are still hot between them. But they wonder if they should check out a sex club just to add a little spice. They are monogamous, and have no interest in contact with other women. Their friends say it’s impossible to remain exclusive with … Read More »

With Randy Rainbow

Give Dan his birthday present in the comments.
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An apology is required! But who is in the wrong here? An NB person got so, so sick with covid. They had already made out with their boyfriend, so he was already exposed — by our so, so sick caller. When they asked him to come over, deliver some food, and offer bit of comfort … Read More »

A Special Little Place

On the Magnum: Caleb Hearon
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A man was flirting with a woman online… and then his girlfriend found out. She threw him out, and messaged all their friends and family about the incident. Police were involved. Should they get back together? Dan calls him up to get all the salacious details, and you get to listen. On the Magnum, Dan … Read More »

With Esther Perel

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She slept with a lad who didn’t wear a condom when he said he would, came inside her and wouldn’t help pay for Plan B. The hitch? He’s great in bed, and she is hard up. Should she sleep with him again, if he promises to be a good boy? A caller challenges Dan on … Read More »

Semen Terroir

On the Magnum: What Are John & Maria Doing???
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Oh no! He broke the flirting rules. He kissed a lady and lied about it. (He lies a lot apparently.) But now, it makes her sick to look at him. What now? A man and his boyfriend just bought a house together and they are setting up one of the rooms as a nursery…because they … Read More »

Sex & Politics #33: Mike Pesca

Kamala's Long Pause
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In this Magnum extra, Dan brings back his pal and sparring partner Mike Pesca to pour over the Harris-Trump debate. Mike Pesca is the host and creator of The Gist, the longest running daily news and analysis podcast, and the author of Upon Further Review: The Greatest What-Ifs In Sports History. He and Dan talk … Read More »

Donate along with Doc Barak!

On the Magnum: Jill Filipovic on millennial resentment
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A man and his girlfriend are well-matched. Except…she doesn’t like to kiss and he NEEDS to kiss to get his erotic motor running. Whatever can they do? The good doctor Barak is back… but this time he’s here to share his political giving strategy for this election, where your dollar is mightier than ever. And … Read More »

Cure Me of My Cowboy Fetish!

On the Magnum: Don Martin
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Git along little doggie! A gay man in academia has always been into cowboys. But he fights his brain, due to the inherently problematic nature of this fetish. Can (or should) he scrub these fantasies from his mind? A woman in Berlin would like to go to Folsom Europe. But would she be welcome? Dan … Read More »

Meth Baby

On the Magnum: Interview with the Cross-Dresser
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Workplace intrigue ahoy! A gay trans man who passes completely, is out to some of his co-workers but not all. Over drinks, one of his bosses told him he was bi, but not attracted to male genitals. So was this his way of acknowledging that the caller is trans, and flirting with him? Or was … Read More »

Sex & Politics #32: California State Senator Scott Wiener

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Sex and politics is BACK, baby! And we’re heavy on the politics this time. What an honor it is to have California State Senator Scott Wiener back on the show. He has been a fearless advocate for gay rights, sexual freedom, and also urban housing issues. He and Dan have a long deep-dive conversation about … Read More »

Suction Toys for the Win!

On the Magnum: Dr Carlton on Mpox and butt sex
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A woman is starting up a new relationship. Her previous boyfriend was a dom who introduced her to kink. She loved it but found it all too contrived. How can she take the parts of Dom/sub dynamics she likes and leave the scripted parts behind? It used to take her soooooo long to come. But … Read More »

My, what a thoughtful, sensitive sadist!

On the Magnum: The Funny Dom
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Is JD Vance Dan’s friend’s lost gerbil??? A straight man was horrified to discover that he wasn’t attracted to his hook-up when she took her clothes off. She extracted a confession from him, and he was honest about his sudden repulsion. Was this the right thing to do? A woman would like to help her … Read More »

Should She Sleep with the Gardener?

On the Magnum: Date like a commie with TherapyJeff!
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We start the show with a simple question. Should she sleep with the gardener? Her marriage has become sexless, and though her husband swears he would be into a three-way, she wants to audition the hot gardener first. Some questions require a medical opinion. Some questions are so gnarly that only the most intrepid medical … Read More »

“My theybie’s genitals are none of your concern.”

On the Magnum: Wry n' Dry with Comedian Emily Catalano
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Hear the modern tale of the single mom, who is so committed to raising a “theybie” that she won’t let her best friend babysit, lest she take a peek down below while changing diapers. A woman is worried about her brother. He has been sober for a couple years after a traumatic childhood. Now he … Read More »

Getting Over Divorce

On the Magnum: Dr. Sara Glass
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A woman with the best intentions wants to secretly hire a sex worker for her depressed, newly divorced friend. Any downsides here? Speaking of divorce, Dan gives a long pep-talk to a man struggling with how to get over his. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Sara Glass, author of the fantastic memoir Kissing … Read More »

“Who’s That?”

On the Magnum: Sadie Dingfelder on Face Blindness
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A man’s new boyfriend had an adult circumcision, and now can’t come very easily. He wants to help his boyfriend come, but doesn’t want to pressure him. How can he thread the needle and start gobbling? A straight man is in a brat/dom dynamic, where his girlfriend “misbehaves” and then gets “punished” by the caller. … Read More »

Done: Pegging IS in the Oxford English Dictionary.

On the Magnum: comedian Andy Richter
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It’s the “Overthinking It” episode! “I’ll give you $100 if you spit in my beer.” This offer was made by a random gentleman in a sushi bar to an unsuspecting lady. She declined. Would you do it? Is anything wrong here? Overthinking it? Meanwhile, a man wonders if the dubious ethics he saw in a … Read More »

Sex & Politics #31: Amanda Marcotte

Impurity Politics
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No Micro or Magnum show this week, as both Dan and Nancy are on vacation. But here is a new Sex & Politics for the Magnum subs. For this Sex & Politics, Dan brings back Amanda Marcotte, Senior Politics Writer at Salon. An outspoken feminist and leftie, she and Dan had a wide-ranging conversation, looking … Read More »

Wanna-Be Cult Leaders.

On the Magnum: Leo Herrera on Analog Cruising
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Her husband of ten years is interested in learning about non-monogamy. He started attending workshops about “divine femininity” and “dark masculinity.” The workshop leader seems sketchy and cultish to the caller. How can she vet this potential grifter and help her husband develop a little reasonable skepticism? A woman and her husband have been in … Read More »

Our Beautiful National Parks

With special guest: Lyz Lenz
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A straight woman wants to explore her bitchy side. She feels like all her edge got sanded away, and now she wants to try out the dom role. How can she find a man who wants a selfish, in-charge lover? Meanwhile, a straight man is frustrated that his lady won’t let him go down on … Read More »

The Sexiest Haircut

On the Magnum: Jason Roeder gives BAD ADVICE.
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Getting a haircut is boring! Unless. Unless your hairstylist strokes your neck, pulls your hair, talks dirty to you and asks if you wanna fool around. A straight man was walking home late at night when a drunk man demanded to know if he was a [homosexual gentleman]. In a moment of improvised solidarity, the … Read More »

The Plight of the Long-Haired Homo

On the Magnum: Comedian Jared Goldstein
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Dan takes on a couple of heavy calls this week- A woman learned that her ex-boyfriend of 8 years was convicted on child pornography charges. He will almost certainly go to prison. He was once her fiancé. Rough stuff. Then, Dan helps a woman make the heart-breaking choice between a single or a double mastectomy. … Read More »

“My boyfriend’s son is stealing my underpants.”

On the Magnum: Dr. Evan Goldstein
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Yikes! Her boyfriend’s pre-teen son has been stealing her underwear. This very naughty lad lives with them half the time. How can she get this boundary violation out of her head? 12 long years ago, he cheated on his wife. They got through it with therapy and endless processing. While watching TV with their kids … Read More »

Tea-Bagging Semantics

On the Magnum: Comedian Rachel Feinstein
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A lesbian has befriended a married lesbian couple. She thinks they’re both hot, and in various light-hearted conversations, they said they were open to group sex. But were they serious? Should the caller proposition them? When a woman was 17, she connected with a 24 year-old man, and began a fraught relationship full of sex, … Read More »

Sex & Politics #30 Diana Adams

Poly Rights Now!
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For this Sex & Politics, Dan brings back Diana Adams, lawyer and legal advocate for queer and poly communities. Diana is the Executive Director of Chosen Family Law Center, a nonprofit providing free legal representation for low-income LGBTQIA+ families, asylum seekers, and trans communities in NY, and national legislative advocacy for LGBTQIA+, polyamorous, and non-nuclear … Read More »

Wet & Messy

On the Magnum: Peggy Orenstein on Choking Hazards
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Her man used to enjoy chewing tobacco, and it messed up his teeth. He has quit at her behest, but now he really needs to see a dentist. She doesn’t want to shame him for his nasty mouth, but she also doesn’t want to kiss him. How can she gently guide him into a dentists … Read More »

Sweaty Parties and Sex Dolls

On the Magnum: TV writer Stan Zimmerman
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When you throw a sweaty, sexy party, and most of the guests have left, except for your girlfriend and her ex, and this ex offers to suck your dick, saying his current girlfriend won’t mind a bit, should you take his word for it? A woman has met a new guy and likes him a … Read More »

When your partner wants to see…or be… a sex worker.

On the Magnum: Jenée Desmond-Harris- Slate's "Dear Prudence."
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A woman’s party fell apart when her good-looking friend flirted with all the men and then led them away to a club. Was this a competitive power move? What kind of friend is this? Expiration dates! You wouldn’t drink old milk. Is it equally dangerous to use lube past its time? On the Magnum, Dan … Read More »

Interview with the Financial Dominatrix

On the Magnum: Wobbly Triads with Neil McNeil
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A woman has been enjoying an insertable vibrator that can be controlled by her partner. Whee! But she worries that if she wears it out in public, it constitutes a consent violation for the unwitting baristas who don’t know why her eyes are crossing all of a sudden. On both the Micro and the Magnum, … Read More »

Sex & Politics #29: Tim Miller

Tim Miller is NOT STONED.
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For this very special April 20th episode of Sex & Politics, Dan speaks with Republican apostate and charming podcaster Tim Miller, about the importance of voting blue (for you know who) this coming November. A second Trump presidency would just be too harsh of a toke. And, to fulfill the “sex ” part of “Sex … Read More »

Can You Be Poly Without “Catching Feelings?”

On the Magnum: Humor writer Alexandra Petri
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A woman moved into a new house and promptly slept with her roommate. It was great sex and the caller wants a repeat. He claims he wants more as well, but then never actually takes her up on it. One night she asked if he wanted to…you know…do it, and he chose to play video … Read More »

What Should I Do Down There?

On the Magnum: PrEP talk with Benjamin Ryan
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A woman’s boyfriend wants her to play with his ass. But she doesn’t know where to begin. Fingers? Tongue? What should she do down there? A woman keeps getting harassed by men in cars jacking it and watching her creepily. What can she do in these unpleasant moments? On the Magnum Dan chats with journalist … Read More »

Wait. Pre-Natal Masturbation?

On the Magnum: Dr. Eric Sprankle author of DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation.
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A gay man keeps sleeping with non-monogamous, married men, who are ultimately emotionally unavailable. But the sex is great! Why isn’t he attracted to single men, hmmmm? Parenting challenge ahoy! A couple with a blended family are getting along well, except for one thing. The mom’s 15 year-old daughter loses her mind when she hears … Read More »

Sex & Politics #28

With Rob Henderson
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For this episode of Sex & Politics, Dan speaks with Rob Henderson, author of “Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family, and Social Class.” Rob’s heart-breaking memoir goes into his wrenching childhood, and also his concept of “luxury beliefs,” – sanctimonious ideas that the upper classes advocate for, but usually don’t follow themselves, and ultimately … Read More »

Pal Power!

With Rhaina Cohen of "The Other Significant Others."
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So, is he gay? The evidence: He likes sucking wieners, anal play, and he has a sex machine that he uses on his butt. Also, he is showing less and less interest in having sex with the caller, and when she asks him about it he responds “Is sex all you care about?” An anxious … Read More »

Saline Infusion Enthusiasts Rejoice!

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You guys! We are in crisis! There are just not enough hot young women! DO. THE. MATH. A woman is dating a trans woman. Her girlfriend recently got bottom surgery, and wants to try being penetrated by an actual penis, as opposed to a toy. Should the caller allow for an open relationship to accommodate … Read More »

Help! My Wife is Dating her Tattoo Artist!

On the Magnum: Sister Exes
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“Ewww! Blood!” That’s what her boyfriend says whenever she even mentions her menstrual cycle. Should she try to educate him as to why this is immature and offensive to a lady with lady parts? Dan has a conversation with a man whose wife is unilaterally opening their relationship. Can their marriage withstand his wife getting … Read More »

More, more, more.

Guest : Molly Roden Winter of "More."
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A 27 year-old divorced woman goes to bars and picks up both men and women. She prefers them to be at least 10 years older because (as everyone knows,) they are better in bed. How can she find people in this age range, and keep their attention? A young, gay hottie hasn’t had sex in … Read More »

Dad’s ne’er do well houseguest.

On the Magnum: Hope Woodard of "Boysober."
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A woman’s 60 year-old dad has taken in a much younger woman of dubious repute. She is a massage therapist, and has been cleaning her father’s house. Her father claims that taking her in is just the Christian thing to do. The caller worries her father is being taken advantage of- she and her brother … Read More »

Men and Feet.

On the Magnum: "Going Solo" with Peter McGraw
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Why is it always men that are into foot fetishes? And speaking of feet, a woman has a pair of fetish shoes that no longer fit. She wants to make sure they go to a loving home, but how? Our guest this week is Peter McGraw, author of “Solo: Building a Remarkable Life of your … Read More »

Sex & Politics #27 with Tim Miller

A gay leftie and a homo conservative walk into a bar...
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On this episode of Sex & Politics, Dan Savage and Republican apostate Tim Miller, take a cold, hard look at this dreadful election cycle. As you may recall, Tim Miller was a communications director for the Jeb Bush 2016 presidential campaign, and subsequently, saw the light, and became an outspoken critic of Donald Trump. With … Read More »

You wanna do WHAT on our wedding night??!!

On the Magnum: Intimacy Expert Rena Martine
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A hearty Valentine’s Day to all of you freaky, perverted, lovelorn wretches. We begin the show with a humdinger of a call from a man whose wedding night is shaping up to be very special indeed. A married woman shares a phone with her husband. She notices that the ads served on his Instagram feed … Read More »

With Ezra Klein.

On the Magnum: Ezra Klein on poly culture & families.
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We are still shocked that Ezra Klein (of the NYT and the Ezra Klein Show) agreed to come on our smutty little podcast. They talked about Ezra’s time as a monogamous straight man embedded in San Fransisco’s polyamorous culture. They compare the current NYC hipster version of the poly scene vs San Fransisco’s meld of … Read More »

“Enough with the poly!”

On the Magnum: The Daily Show's Dulcé Sloan
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“Enough with the poly! ” Or so says this gay man, who is sick of being disrespected by his boyfriend catting around, acting like a no-good cad and using polyamory as a shield. Meanwhile, can’t a homo in the rural West have nice, no-strings-attached hook-ups anymore? All the men he meets want to get married … Read More »

Sex & Politics #26: Kat Rosenfield

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Today on Sex & Politics, Dan welcomes writer, columnist and podcaster, Kat Rosenfield. They talk about her piece in Reason Magazine about the “Trad Wife” TikTok phenomenon. Are they just kinky subs? Or girl bosses? They also go into the Tumblr-fueled explosion of identities that happened in 2014, and the case FOR a sexual revolution. … Read More »

Interview with the Adult Baby

On the Magnum: Erika Moen on safe, soft sex toys.
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A man’s wife had to quit drinking due to a medical condition. They used to get tipsy and have wild sex. Now that she can’t drink the sex has become rote and inhibited. They plan to go on vacation together, but the caller feels that if they can’t have their free-wheeling sex, he doesn’t want … Read More »

Clean the Fridge, Worm!

On the Magnum: Dominatrix Inanna Justice
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A gay man’s best friend has such a devastating crush on him, that they can’t be friends anymore. The caller begged him to try to get over it. But crushes are crushing. Is there anything this (platonically) jilted caller can do? Here’s the scenario: A straight, divorced woman starting dating a *wonderful* man, and they … Read More »

Perving Gym Dudes.

On the Micro AND Magnum: Damona Hoffman
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Happy Feast of the Ass for all who celebrate! A gay man is fed up with the guys who try to use the gym as their personal hook-up site. When the leering moves into harassment, should he tell management? Or is this just to be expected in gay male spaces? A recently divorced straight man … Read More »

Beer Can Blues.

On the Magnum: Two Dykes and a Mic.
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A German lesbian was propositioned by a younger grad student. (This sounds like a porno but it’s not.) The grad student was raised in a conservative environment, and it’s the first time she’s ever spoken of her female attraction. They only have a month before they both move away. Should the caller get down with … Read More »

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